Simple fact of life #1:
The only person that gets all the pie he wants is the baker.
Simple solution #1:
If you want pie, turn on the oven and grab a rolling pin.
Simple fact of life #2:
Every time a pie is cut, some crumbs are left on the plate. If you slice the pie into too many pieces, there are nothing but crumbs, and everyone goes without dessert.
Simple solution #2:
Refer to simple solution #1.